Ode to Statistics Paper 7, Group A

While you were there, smug and grinning
Out of that detested green notebook of mine,
When days were hard and heads were spinning,
And all I would is mope and whine.

Dismal days, mournful evenings, terrible nights,
(Mornings I would sleep unheeding),
Who knew heteroscedasticity could create such frights
And all one could say is bloomin' and bleedin'.

I would gaze at the formulae perplexed,
Classifying most derivations as miracles of God,
I would walk about harried and vexed,
Could hardly give it up, would not plod.

Ah those precious winter noons,
Now never return to memory or weather,
When explained MLEs were boons,
To forced testings myself I would tether.

You were my nemesis, my curse,
My Everest, unconquered, unvanquished.
You still look so forbidding, so terse,
Like those dukes who so languished.

Now that you are gone, I wander about lost,
Slightly bemused, mostly confused,
You gave me purpose, like warmth to frost,
You hide now like a madman accused.

I sing my woes, paint my toes,
Lurk around curtains, scare sneaking cats,
You and I may have come almost to blows,
But hating you gave life a meaning, do I sound bats?

I still do not understand correlation,
Never really read up Durbin Watson test,
Left the pages on auto correlation,
Econometrics makes me feel like a disliked guest.

I might be back again with you in weeks,
Or may not if luck favours,
I still owe you much, the guilt reeks,
The heart says you are a fool, the mind wavers.

The truth is I am witlessly, mind numbingly bored,
So bored, for even you I pine,
I await for sense, until then thoughts are to be ignored
I am all right really, not insane yet, completely fine.

Why Recessions are not the Best Times to Marry

1. You dunno when your partner is kicked out of the job and the poverty line seems attainable.
   
2. You dunno the real income of your partner till better times- adjusting the inflation figures to recession situations are not a good idea!!
3. Bullion markets are on a high- so you can never satisfy your in-laws with gold. ;) (Besides, why lose out on something like more gold when the prices are low?)
4. If you get married during a recession and have kids during a boom, by the time they are 4-5 years, we'll reach another recession- could reduce the generation gap...
   

The other day someone sent a sms "The recession has struck so bad that women are now marrying for love." Here's earnestly hoping that you girls (n yaa boys too), know what to do with it!!

After just having given one ,Im fresh with memories of spending 1.5 hrs pencil shading on a thick white sheet printed with pink circles and instructions.

Pros
1.Professors don't have to go through bad handwriting and shocking answers.They can Of course choose to put in funny options for a bit of humor in their humongous lives.
2.Students can play games like "eenie meenie minee moe".Its both relieveing and accurate at 5% level of singnificance.Ok make it 25% for the unlucky folks out there .
3.
a)This is one format that gives a better scope to cheat.But one has to be really really careful with the sequence.
b) Easier to cheat since your "helper" just needs to point out the correct option.You can make good use of fingers and even indulge in some stretching exercises while doing this.
4.If you finish shading the whole thing early.You can always make the shading darker.Dark black holes on a white pink printed sheet.Reminds me of those being abused in the name of love.

Cons
1.Professors dont get to read funny answers.Students are not allowed to be "creative"
eg.Q)How does amoeba catch its prey?
ans)In the wee hours of daylight when the sun has just come out.Little Amoeba steps out of its den.Like a skilled hunter it cautiously follows its prey.It suddenly grabs its prey from behind and with one sharp stroke the prey is killed by the swift amoeba.The end.
2.People with good handwritings don't get a better score.Some people are Ofcourse happy with this(read.............. umm ok dont read).
3.People with Luckier stars get undue advantage.